Monday, May 18, 2015

My Purpose

My dearest loved ones, 

Alright, I'm going to do something a little different than what I have been usually doing. Instead of telling about my week day by day and mentioning everyone and their dog, I'm going to focus on something that I have learned this week and kind of tie it to my experience in the MTC. I realize I didn't mention a lot about what I learned in the MTC. The 12 days I was there made a huge impact on my life and is so dear to me that I would like to share them with ya'll.

So, the first day in the MTC was full of emotions...nervous, anxious, exciting, sad, stressed, a little mad because I didn't go running that morning, and numb. I can barely remember what happened the first few minutes I walked in, because everything was happening so fast, but I just couldn't stop smiling because I was so excited! I just remember everyone being so happy and extremely nice! I would walk down the halls with my name tag, that had an orange dot on it, and instantly everyone would say "Welcome to the MTC!!" I thought it was a bit weird how everyone was so nice, but I loved it! 

When we met our companions and district we all headed to the main building to meet the Presidency with all the other newbys. I think it was President that came up to me and said "Why are you so happy?" I simply said "I'm just happy to be here!" Haha he just laughed and said that's good. After the meeting we got together for an activity, which was AMAZING!! There were three investigators in different rooms and we would spend at least 45 minutes in each room. Hearing their personal experiences, trials that they've had, or are currently going through. It was really interesting to hear what other missionaries had to say. But hearing everyone's input and how much they knew, I started feeling like I did't know enough, I shouldn't be here on a mission, and that I simply should just go home. I started to beat down on myself and got really discouraged. We later we talked about our purpose as missionaries and that was just what I needed.

"My purpose is to invite others unto Christ by helping them receive the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end."     -Preach My Gospel pg. 1

My purpose as a missionary isn't for me. I'm representing Christ and I am serving the people of California. I share a name tag with Christ. I am honored to share that with His name. In order for us to fulfill our purpose as missionaries we need to do 3 things:

1. Be an example
We become leaders to the ones we are teaching. They come to us for help and guidance. We are representing Christ and his service here on Earth. Not only do we need to lead and be an example of Christ but we need to practice what we preach. It's simply not possible for us to teach someone by the spirit and expect them to do something if we ourselves aren't living the principles of the gospel.

2. Love
Like I mentioned before, we are representing Christ and we are also representing His love. Christ came to this earth, knowing exactly what was going to happen, but that didn't stop him from doing His work. To serve. To set them straight! And to love them with all His heart. Even after He was crucified, He came down with arms wide open. So forgiving to all and He wants us to come to Him.

3. Have Faith in yourself
If you don't have faith in yourself, how can you possibly have faith in your investigators?? We have been given authorized power so he can work through us. We have been called by the prophet. He obviously thinks we can do this, so does our Heavenly Father, and so should we.

Before my mission I was a little scared. I'm going out and sharing something that is so precious to me. But I've learned that I can do everything in my power and share my testimony with others, but they have the agency to except it or not. It's all according to the Lord's plan. And who knows, down the road I made a difference in their lives.

D&C 4,6,11,14 and 16
The fields are white, ready to harvest. The lord has prepared the way for us and we need to harvest the work with all our heart, might, mind and strength. We might have to be the ones that plant those seeds.

    "People don't care about what you know they just want to know that you care."   -Elder Fa

Lately we have been doing a lot of service and not as many lessons, but I think that our actions speak more than words. We just need to serve with our hearts.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. 
He that feareth is not made perfect in love. We love him, because he first loved us.
1 John 4:18-19

At times I might think I won't be a good enough missionary or that I can't do this. But one thing that I learned is that it doesn't matter on how much you know, because what you do know is enough. I have my testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ, that these things are true, and that's really all I need. I was talking to my companion the other day and told her that it doesn't matter how many baptisms I have or if have any all, I know I am doing the best thing I could ever do, and to me, that is serving our Father in Heaven. I mean don't get me wrong I would love to have a lot baptisms but just as long as I know I'm doing what I'm suppose to, and bringing the gospel to those who don't know, and giving them the chance to accept it is all that matters. God has prepared these sweet people and I am here ready for them when they are ready. When they have that desire to know more. I could go through my whole mission without a baptism and I would be okay with that. But knowing that I made a difference in someone's life by serving them is all that matters to me. And who knows, maybe years later, they will have the chance to see missionaries again and remember me, and want to know more. We are all on the Lord's time and we just need to be patient. I need to lose myself in this work and be the best missionary I can.

He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.
Matthew 10:39 

"If you want to baptize one person talk to one person if you want to baptize a few people talk to a few people but if you want to baptize everyone talk to everyone"   -Elder Gillies

Our missionary purpose isn't just for the mission, it's for our everyday lives. By the way we are living the gospel, others will see how it makes us happy. They will see the light in your eyes and they'll desire to want to have that too. Heavenly Father puts people in our lives for a reason. It may be that they help us through what we are going through, but we too can help them by sharing what is so dear to our hearts. Don't be selfish! Share what you know. What's the worse thing that can happen? They don't want it? Well, then that's ok. We all have the chance to know about the truth. And they have their agency. We just have to keep trying and to love them. So this week I challenge all of you to share what you know to someone who is feeling down or doesn't know. Text them a scripture. I promise that if you do, not only will you feel better, but you will make a difference in someone's life.

Alright, so this week has been really hard. My eating disorders have been getting harder to fight. Sister Smith was getting pretty worried and suggested I call President Marston. Later today I will be meeting with him about everything. But I truly am happy, I'm just dealing with a little trial. I can do this with the Lord's help. I know all things are possible. I love you all so dearly and hope things are going well. 

Love, Sister Tay Tay

Thursday, April 30, 2015


Hey hey hey!! It's my sweet fellow beings! All right, so can I just say
God is great. The big man really does know what he's doin'. I'll
explain a little later because it goes along with the days that I've
had out in the field.

First thing, so you know how I've been having stomach problems lately?
Well, I was praying that they would go away and for the strength to be
able to keep going. And it was amazing, right as the plane landed my
stomach pains were gone. Completely gone. I felt so good, like I could
do anything in the world. He really does hear our prayers. 

So we then met our mission President and his sweet wife. Got our luggage and
headed to the mission office where I got to write you letting you know
I didn't die. But so much has happened since. So once I was done
writing you, we met with some sister missionaries and we headed out to
do some tracting. Yup, once you get there you send ya right out there.
Like a deer in the headlights. Haha  It was good. 

No one answered their door even though we could hear them inside but I wasn't
too worried about that because there's no rush I have a year and a
half. But that doesn't mean I shouldn't work hard! I just can't get
discouraged too easily. It takes time and patience. And I can handle
that. I'm in the Lord's hands - meaning I'm on his time. Once we got
back we got our dinners and went to the hotel, where Sister Young and
I ate our food and I fell asleep on the bed at like 6:30! Haha It was a
long day!

On Thursday, we got our companion and area assignments. My companion is Sister
Smith and we are serving in Lincoln, the bottom part of Roseville
We don't have a car so we either walk or ride bikes. I love
it here!! It's so beautiful! Sometimes you get Palm trees, pine trees
and cactus' all in the front yard, haha but it's gorgeous here. 

The people are amazing! I have such love for each one of them. I've gotten
to know my ward pretty well and it's crazy. Some of the ward members
remind me of Nanny and Papa. It's so much fun. We live in an apartment
where it's a bit sketchy. Sometimes at night we have to carry a knife
while we walk back home. We're also surrounded by peacocks!! They
beautiful, but so loud! They kind of sound like Kevin off of the movie Up! But oh
well I'll get used to it. We also met our new district and they are so
fun!! They all are so different but are like the best of friends. 

So I guess we're in a drought and they are needing rain really bad. So
I prayed one night and the next day it poured.  It was awesome! I
love the weather here. It's cool in the mornings then warms up during
the day, (which stinks when we're biking) then gets cool again. It's really
humid here and I absolutely love it!! 
 Saturday we did service all morning. It was amazing we went to the
salt mine. That's where we organized food and gave it to people that
weren't able to afford food. It was sad to see how many people were
there and how skinny some were. But all were so sweet and generous.
It's amazing when you serve you have such love for everyone, even the
ones you don't know very well or at all. 

For dinner we visited the Meyer family. They're a pretty young couple and we asked them how they met and all and we became good friends. Ah they're so cute! I
love'em. But as the day went on...I felt like Satan just really hates me and wants
to bring me down. I started feeling really sick again. Stomach pain
and all. Then I felt like I couldn't do this anymore. That I didn't
have the spirit with me, like I had a whole inside of me. I was 
getting really discouraged because I can't go running. (My
companion hates to run.) So I'm worried I'm gaining weight and my mood isn't being
boosted by the kind of exercise I need. I felt like I should pray, but I didn't want to.

The, on Sunday I did. I asked for strength and motivation to keep going
forward. I can feel a huge difference. I'm a lot happier and
it's like all those feelings are gone. I'm just worried that they're
going to come back. But, I know with the Lords help, I can get through this! 

So at church I met just about everyone and their dog. They were so sweet. Haha they kept saying I look like I'm 12 and that I'm so short. Ha it's funny. During sharing time
in primary we taught about Joseph Smith and the restoration. It was
fun, the little ones are so cute!! After church we went to a 
member's houses to check in with them and dinner. Haha oh man I loved this
family. They are so kind and fun!

Ever since I have said that prayer it's like the Lord has put me in the sky. It's so cool I feel
like I can just about everything. Nothing can get in my way!

P-day!! So when Sister Smith and I woke up we decided to go out and chase the peacocks haha it was so much fun!! We then went running for 3 minutes..ya I was a bit bugged. But Smith promised that we're going to run 20 mins tomorrow with an ab workout. I was like heck ya we are!!
As we got ready we were listening to music and the song I Will Serve Thee Dear Lord came on and I couldn't help but smile and tear
up. I feel so happy! I feel so blessed with all the Savior has done
for me and am blessed to be serving Him. It's moments like these where I
can see the Lord's hand in everything. I can see my purpose and why I'm
out here. I couldn't asked to be doing anything else. It's going to be
hard but I say bring it on!! If you think about it a mission isn't
really that hard. All you're doing is serving. But I think that we
push ourselves to the point where we get discouraged, if we have
patience with the people we are serving and ourselves, and have faith in
the Lord, all things are possible. 
So once we got ready we went to the
Meyer's house to do laundry where I emailed you a little bit. We
headed home afterwards and the Sisters and Elders went on a hike,
called Camp Far West. Oh my goodness, I wish I had taken my camera or my
iPad cause it was gorgeous!!! I'll have to ask around and see who took
some pics and send them to you. It was funny. I was skipping and
laughing, just being me and one of the Elder's, Elder Raab, was like, your happiness is slowly killing me you gotta tone it down a bit. haha
I looked at him (may I remind you he's 6'4) and said Ya right! Haha we
all love to tease each other. It's fun. 
Well, like I said God is great. The big man knew exactly what he was
doing. He see's the big picture. I can't even imagine what it would be
like to be put on this Earth without knowing the things I do. Life
really would be pointless. But that's what I'm here for. I'm out
serving the Lord with all my heart, might, mind and strength so that
His children have the chance or opportunity to hear about the gospel.
And it's up to them to either accept or reject. But that doesn't
change how I feel towards them and our loving Heavenly

I love this gospel so much. It has made me so happy! And I'm
grateful for Satan. That might sound weird, but I truly am. He has made me
realize that without this gospel we wouldn't be able to feel peace,
comfort and the happiness it brings us. The other night when I was praying to
Heavenly Father, I was so frustrated with Satan. I kept telling
Heavenly Father I'm so sick of him, he just makes me so mad!! I
kept goin on and on and then I said if I ever get the chance to meet
him face to face oh, I would just...and I stopped for a bit and said I
would look him in the eyes and say I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that you
are so bitter and mad with yourself that you have to take it out on us
and your Father. I'm sorry that you will never experience this joy and
Man it just makes me feel bad for the guy. But God gave all of us agency
and that's his choice for feeling that way. He doesn't have to, but
sometimes we all have to learn the hard way. I still have hope for
him. But it's not up to me to make that judgement.

From the looks of everything, it sounds like everyone is doing
well. Which is so good! Sometimes during the day I imagine what you
are all doing. Haha either running around or chillin' at home. I don't
know, for me to think of what you all are doing helps me so I don't feel
homesick. Which is good. But I sure do miss every each one of you like
crazy. Not much longer and I'll be on my way home. It'll come up
fast. It's crazy to think that I've almost been out for a month! Haha
time does fly when you're out having fun. 
Well I love you all! Keep me
updated.  DYB, TP, BV 
 Love Sister Barton 

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

22 April 2015

Antelope Valley California

Hello sweet family! 

Well, I'm just writing you letting you know that I've made it to beautiful California Roseville. So far I love it here! It's so green and there are rice fields! Guess I'll be eating a lot of rice YES!! 
When we arrived at the airport, we met the sweet missionaries that were leaving to go home. They guided us to our mission president's and guess what?? Elder Gillies was there to help us with our bags as well haha I wasn't expecting to see him, but he's been helping us out today. 
But anyways, just being here has made me more excited to serve. We actually get to go out with the sister missionaries in just a few minutes and I can't wait!! It's gonna be so fun! But I'm not gonna lie, I'm kind of scared, but I know that with the help of the Lord and the Holy Ghost everything will be ok. 
Well, just wanted to write and let you know that I'm still alive and made it here safely. I love you all so very much! Hope things are going well back at home.
Love, Sister Barton

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Thursday, 16 April 2015

Ok, so I don't have a lot of time at the moment. But I just wanted to say thank you so much for the package and all the dear elder letters. I was so happy to see my blanket in there. It reminded me of home it also smells like home too. And thank you for the nuts as well. My district makes fun of me for how much I eat them they say "Squints you're nuts for da nuts." Haha I love my district so much!! They really are like my family. 
So I told you a little about my companion. The sweetest person you'll ever meet. She's really quiet but when she does say something it's hilarious!! She doesn't like to run..which is all right! I still love her. I sometimes drag her to the gym hehe. Not everyday we get to go to the gym, but when we do I run for 20 mins then play some bball with the Elder's... BAWLER!! 
So I'll tell you a little about my district. There's Sister Marshall. She's from New Zealand! Well you know how sometimes we talk in an Australian ancient? Ya I can't do that here cause she always looks at me weird when I do. But she's the best! I love her to death. Her testimony is so strong. She's known to have the box of tissues in front of her haha she tends to cry a lot during the lessons and it's rubbing off on me..but they say tears are the spirit coming out so let them roll off your cheek. 
Then there is Sister Orme and oh my goodness, I have never met someone so funny in my life. She's a bit older, about 21. She's from Las Vegas, sin city baby!! She just says the littlest thing and I crack up (but I guess that isn't hard to do anyways), but there have been times where I almost pee my pants because of how much she makes me laugh. 
These three beautiful girls are my roommates as well. I couldn't have asked for better Sisters in my district. 
Now, the Elder's. To start off there is Elder Milakovic. He's from Indiana and loves to do crossfit so we talk about lifting sometimes. He has such a great personality. He is always positive and singing as well as making up raps haha but good ones of course. They're mainly about the church..I wish you could here some of them. His companion is Elder O'Connor. He's from Huntington Beach! He played soccer for BYU Hawaii with Gent! We found that out and we just laughed that we both knew Gent. But he's a great fellow, he likes to talk a lot but you put both him and Elder Milakovic together and you just can't stop laughing!! We actually wrote down all the quotes that we have with each other on our planner when I get home I'll have to show you what they say. 
Then there is Elder Beazer, he's from Canada and some of the things he says, because he's Canadian, are so funny!! 
Oh boy, well then last but not least there's Elder Dunn. Ha one of our inside jokes are "Are you Dunn?" I guess you really just have to be there to have it be funny. He's from Idaho. But he's so shy and doesn't say much. But during the lessons he is so spiritual and some of his comments are just amazing. I am so blessed to have these people in my district. They have helped me in so many ways. I love being where everyone is so sweet and happy to the point where it could get annoying, but it doesn't because you're just as happy. 
Not gonna lie when they said it was going to be hard they weren't kidding. I have felt every kind of emotion here. And I can testify that the adversary is real and he hates missionary work and tries everything in his power to make you feel like crap and like you can't do anything. I asked the Elder's to give me a blessing and instantly I have felt peace and comfort. I can do this. I am enough and with the Lords help anything is possible. 
Yesterday we had a lesson on Christ and I have never felt Heavenly Father and Christ's love so strongly before. I bawled like a baby but it was so good! Man, I wish I could just send you the things I write in my journal. I think what I'm going to do is make copies of the pages and send them to you cause there's so much that I want to tell you and I just simply don't have enough time. 
Also I need to send home some shoes..I guess they are too high and there are open toed shoes. But obedience is the most important thing! So I leave this coming Tuesday morning at 3:45 in da mornin'. Then my p-days will be on Mondays, so not for another two weeks. 
All right, well my time is almost up, but I just wanted to say thank you for everything that you guys do. It really means a lot to get letter's and emails from you... especially packages. But just know how much I love you, which is so much!! My arms are definitely not long enough to show you how much.. but I miss you guys so dearly. Love you all, talk to you soon!!
Love, Sister Barton